


The Artist

by StylesxGucci



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: 1d, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No One Direction, Art, Dark, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fanfiction, Fluff and Smut, Harry Styles - Freeform, Rape/Non-con Elements, References to Depression, Sex, Suicidal Thoughts, Violence, artist, mature - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 13:54:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15144542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StylesxGucci/pseuds/StylesxGucci
Summary: It only takes a moment for the perfect life to fall to pieces.It takes much longer to put the pieces back together~Elliot finally got her big break, but a betrayal sends her spiralling into a world she's never known. The confident young women finds herself trying to hold her once perfect life together, now hanging on by a thread. Her life was ripped from her, can she put it back together?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story contains strong languages, graphic depictions of sexual assault, sex and violence.  
> Warnings will also be put up in chapters.

"Ellie, are you ready?" I heard Lucy ask from the other side of the door. I stared in the mirror, running my hands through my hair. I fixed the top of my dress and took deep breaths. My nerves were running high. I've waited so long for a moment like this, a chance to become something. This was me, one step closer to making it to Paris. I looked for a few moments longer, composing myself before stepping out of the bathroom.

"Luce, I've told you a million times not to call me Ellie," I say, stepping out of the bathroom. She smiled and looked me up and down. "Trying to impress someone?" She winked, I playfully rolled my eyes. Lucy has been trying for ages to get me with someone. I think she was mostly trying to get me to move out, so her boyfriend could move in. "This is my first gallery night, I wanna look decent," I say, she laughed a bit and turned me around. She tied the two straps of the dress into a bow. "Well, a certain Michael Wells is going to be there, I heard he's very excited to see your work"

"Michael is only interested in my art, it's a..professional relationship" I pointed out, pulling on my heels. Lucy laughed once again, walking out of the apartment. "Only interested in your art? The only piece of art he's interested in looking at is you" I couldn't help but blush at her corny joke. "Also, he basically paid our rent for us when he bought one of your pieces last month, he's a keeper" Both of us climbed into the car. "I wonder if he hangs it in his room, looking at it at night..." I stopped her before she could continue. "Don't you dare finish that sentence"

The closer to the gallery that we got, the more nervous I felt. "You think I picked the right piece to show tonight?" I looked at Lucy, she could see how nervous I was and grabbed my hand. "I think all your pieces deserve to be up in that gallery, El, I know you're nervous but I promise everyone is going to love your work" She squeezed my hand in a comforting way. "The piece you picked was gorgeous, everyone is going to be gawking at it. Well except Michael, he's already got his eyes on a piece of art" I rolled my eyes again, but I calmed down a bit. Lucy was very good at comforting me.

We parked in the lot, I sat there for a moment. Taking in all of it. This was such an amazing opportunity. How do I stay calm? So many amazing artists have been featured in this gallery and now I am one of them? I felt Lucy squeeze my hand again. "Remember, stay calm and act like you own the place" She climbed out of the car and I followed. I looked at my phone, the gallery would be opening in less than an hour. 9:00 pm sharp.

"I am so proud of my little Ellie" She turned to me and squished my cheeks like I was a child. "You know, if you do anything like that when the show starts I am going to have to kill you in your sleep" She kissed my cheek. "What am I not allowed to be proud of my sister?" I smiled a bit and hugged her. "Thank you, Luce, I love you" She hugged tighter and then pulled away, fixing my dress and then hers. "Now, let's get this show on the road"

"There she is!" It was Simons voice, a fellow artist. "How's my gorgeous little artist?" He said, hugging me. I chuckled a bit and hugged him back. "Nervous," I say, pulling away. "Where's Bo? Is he coming tonight?" Simon smiled. "He only came for the food," He said, shaking his head. "Thank god, I wasn't the only one," Lucy said, she smiled at me and headed towards a room. I assumed it was the kitchen. "I told Marcelo to put your piece next to mine" He grabbed my hand and pulled me into the gallery hall. Marcelo was the owner of the gallery, he found my art through Instagram and asked me to be apart of one of his shows. It was crazy, Marcelo was a pretty known artist around London.

Simons art was so beautifully done, his style was purely his own. His art was slightly more dark, showcasing his personal life. It was so raw and emotional. Especially if you knew Simon and what his life had been like. "Simon, you never cease to amaze me" I walked up to his painting and ran my fingers over the figures and shapes. "I almost didn't pick this one, It was nerve-racking putting it up, it's never easy coming out to the world" He stood next to me and stared at it. "I love you know matter what Simon, screw the people who don't accept you for who you are" He looked at me and smiled.

"I'm not the only one with an amazing talent" He walked over to my piece and smiled at it. "I've gotta say El, this is one of the best I have ever seen" I blushed at the compliment, it was still so weird having people notice my art. "I've got to say, I agree with you" I jumped a little at Michaels' voice, he was right behind us. Simon looked at me and smirked. "I'm going to go check on Lucy and Bo, make sure they haven't eaten all the food before we open" He looked at Michael and nodded, walking away from us.

"It really is quite extraordinary" He replaced Simons position and examined my art. "Thank you" I tried extremely hard not to blush. "We have to get together some time and make some art together, our styles together would really compliment each other" He smiled at me, his cute smile was so intriguing. He was so charming, girls flocked towards him. Michael was very good looking and sweet. Though, he was quite intimidating because of his fame in the art community. "I would love that" I looked away from him, attempting to hide my red cheeks. "I can't wait until I see your art next to Picasso, or Da Vinci, I'm sure it'll happen one day" He reached out and traced the art with his fingers, it made me shiver a little as I thought about what it would be like to be touched by him. 

"I'll be back when the doors open Elliot, I'll be sure to tell people to come out your art" He smiled, placing a hand on my shoulder and then walking away. I looked down, biting my lip hard. "Damn Ellie, he really has a thing for you" Lucy walked up to me, handing me a glass of champagne. "Shut up" I mumbled, taking a sip. "I wonder what kind of 'art' he wants to create with you" She smirked. "My god Lucy" I covered my face embarrassed.

"Okay, places people! Doors are opening in 3 minutes!" Marcelo yelled. He rushed around, making sure everything was perfect. He was very tedious when it came to his art gallery. I looked across the room and noticed Michael standing there, He had a couple pieces up in the gallery. All of them, so original. Michael was a fan of line art and he portrayed it a lot on his own but in the most pristine kind of way. I could stare at it for hours.

I stood around my piece for a while, it wasn't to busy in here but it was fairly crowded. "Are pictures allowed?" A girl asked me, I smiled and nodded. "Yeah of course!" I moved out of the way and watched as the girl, who looked around 17, take a selfie of herself and the picture. "You are so talented, I wish my art was as good as this" She admired it for a while longer. "Thank you, it takes a lot of work. I used to think the same thing when I looked at other people's work. You just have to find your own style and roll with it" She smiled and nodded, and then walked away to explore. 

I began to walk around, wanting to explore some more as well. I didn't know all of the artists featured tonight, but I did know some of them or recognized their work. Rita Hill, I didn't know her personally but I could tell it was her work from a mile away. It popped, quite literally. She was another artist who was featured in multiple galleries. She's made a name for herself. I walked up to her section of the gallery and smiled widely at her work. She always used bright colours to make the darker details in her work stand out. 

"You're Elliot? The new feature?" She came up next to me. I nodded. "Yeah, it's my first time ever. It's kind of terrifying" She smiled at me a bit. "Well, I noticed your work. It's very beautiful, though I would have added some more colours to compliment the design. But then again, that's just me" She shrugged. I couldn't tell whether or not she was being passive aggressive or not. I was probably just over thinking it. "I'll think of that for my next piece," I say, I stood there for a moment longer and then walked away.

I noticed Michael, chatting up some girls about his work. I shyly walked over to him. "You're popular," I say, Michael, smiled at me. "Give me a moment ladies" He stepped past them and came up to me. "Well, I can't really help it," He said in an overconfident tone. "I just happen to have that effect on people" He sipped his drink. "I'm sure you have guys tripping at your feet" I shook my head, my face heating up. "I'm more of the awkward art girl, I don't really get noticed too often," I say, biting the inside of my cheek nervously. "Well it just so happens, I have a thing for shy girls" He smiled and moved a bit closer to me. "Really?" I ask, glancing up at him. He smiled. "The shy ones always have more to offer once they open up" He pointed out. "I get that feeling about you"

"How would you like to go out to dinner sometime?" He asked, his face was so close to mine. I thought I was going to faint. As cliche as that sounds. I never thought someone like Michael Wells, would ask me out on a date. He smiled at me, that gorgeous smile any girl would melt over. "It's cute seeing how nervous I make you" He reached up and stroked my cheek. "So is that a yes darling?" He lifted my chin and made me look at him. I bit my lip and nodded. "I-I'd love too" He smiled again. "It's a date" He kissed my cheek and then wandered away. 

Hot damn, I just scored a date with the hottest guy I've ever met.

"Was that what I think it was?" Lucy asked walking up to me. She was smiling widely. "Did Mr. Michael Wells just ask Ms. Elliot Taylor on a date?" I shyly looked at the ground, nodding. "We should definitely celebrate!" She said excitedly. "Is that your excuse to get drunk?" I ask, laughing. "Definitely" She nudged me playfully. 

"Good show everyone!" Marcelo said happily. He clapped his hands together. "How about we all go celebrate this night down at the pub?" He asked with a smile. "Hell yeah!" Everyone was in agreement, I wasn't much of a drinker but I decided to go for Lucy's sake, so she doesn't do anything stupid. She wasn't the smartest drunk.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning, the chapter contains a graphic depiction of sexual assault

The pub was pretty crowded when we got in, music was pounding through the speakers. "Come on, let's go loosen you up for your man!" Lucy pulled me over towards the bar, asking for some shots. "Lucy, I don't know about this, me plus drinking doesn't usually end up very well" I pointed out. I used to be a pretty avid drinker, but I guess I just got sick of not being able to remember anything.  "Don't worry Ellie, I'll make you don't do anything too stupid" She smiled and took a shot. "I think I should be the one keeping an eye out for you" I retorted, but I copied her and took a shot.

"Only a few Luce, I'm not getting shit faced at a pub" I drank a little bit more, making sure to be careful. I hated drinking out in public. I'll gladly drink if I'm with people I trust, but not surrounded by a bunch of strangers. "Oh come on, Michael will keep a good eye on you" Lucy was already getting drunk, she was definitely a lightweight. "Speaking of Mr. Wells, here he comes" Lucy winked at me and walked away.

"Here, I brought you something," Michael said, handing me a drink. "Trying to get me drunk?" I ask, sipping it. "You think so little of me?" He smiled and sat on the stool next to me. "Just want to help you relax" He wrapped his arm around me. "You're on the way to the big leagues Elliot" He toasted his drink to me. "I would love to help you along the way, help you get to Paris" I smiled gratefully and toasted him back. "You really are the most charming man I have ever met" I relaxed in my seat, loving the feeling of his arm wrapped lazily around me. "Only for you love" He kissed my cheek again.

"I think I should switch to water, that drink was really strong," I say laughing a bit, I was starting to feel a little hazy. "Oh just a few more won't hurt you, don't worry, I won't let any creeps come near you" His smile calmed me down. "Alright, just a few more but that's it," I say seriously, allowing Michael to order me another drink. 

I looked at Michael carefully, admiring him. He had the brightest blue eyes I have ever seen, he had dark blonde hair that he always had styled. He was tall and overall he was just so perfect. Not a single flaw on his perfect face. I wanted him to kiss me. I just wanted him, it could also be the booze telling me that. But either way, He was just amazing. He looked back at me and smirked when he noticed I was practically eyeballing him. "Wanna bust out some moves?" Michael asked smiling. I laughed and shook my head. "Me, dancing? Hah!" Dancing, was not my forte. "I'm sure you're an amazing dancer" He pulled me up from my stool and towards the dance floor.

It was loud and crowded, almost everyone was drunk off their asses. I noticed Lucy dancing with Simon and Bo, she was very drunk. Though, I was pretty drunk too but I was alert enough to know what was going on. "You know Elliot, you are a very sexy girl," Michael said, he grabbed my hips and pulled me close to him. "Thanks, Michael, you're quite attractive as well" I wrapped my arms around his neck and smiled at him. "Hmm, would you like to come to my place tonight? I'm sure you're gonna need a drive" His charming smile melted my heart. "Maybe," I say, attempting to flirt with him a bit. We danced along to the music, kind of in our own little world.

"You know it's a little hot in here, wanna go outside for a little bit?" Michael asked. He didn't give me much of a choice as he started guiding me towards the back door. "Yeah sure, I should tell Lucy where I'm going" I was about to pull away from him to go tell Lucy but Michael grabbed my hand lightly. "Don't worry Elliot, I'll let her know" He said reassuringly and pulled me out the back of the pub.

It led to a dark and secluded alleyway, my mind was telling me to go back inside but Michael was here, so I was safe with him. "It's very loud in there, I just wanted to have a little break," Michael said, coming close to me. I was up against the wall. "Besides, I would much rather be alone with you" He smiled and placed his hands on my waist.

He was very close to me, my mind didn't know what to make of the situation. "I think we should go back inside, I don't want Lucy to get worried about me" I was about to head towards the door, but Michael stopped me and pulled me down farther into the alley. "Honestly, I find it kind of boring in there, we could have a lot more fun out here. Don't you think love?" He put his body up against mine. "I don't know Michael....I'm not really in the right mind" I chuckled a little bit and attempted to get him to back up a little, though he didn't budge.

"Oh come on darling you were practically begging for it in there, don't you remember?" He moved one of his hands up to my cheeks and smiled at me. "I know you want me, Elliot, there's no need to be nervous" He moved his other hand up from my waist, towards my breasts. My mind was numb, I really didn't know how to react. "Michael, I- I don't know if I wanna do this right now," I say, weakly trying again to push him away. He ignored me and moved his hands along my body. "You're so sexy baby," He said, roughly kissing me.

I quickly realized what was happening now. I tried harder to push him away from me, but he was much bigger than I was. "Michael, I'm serious. I don't want to do this" I say, pulling my lips from his. "I know you want me to fuck you, you don't need to deny it" He chuckled a little and became more forceful. 

I've never been intimate before and I really didn't want it to happen like this. I've imagined on multiple occasions losing my virginity to Michael, but not like this. Not in some dark alley, half conscious. I was hoping Michael would understand that I wasn't ready right now. Maybe he was just too drunk to realize that I was saying no to him.

"Michael come on, let's go back inside" I tried to stop him again, but it wasn't working. He wasn't listening to me. He kissed me again, pushing his tongue into my mouth. I didn't know what to do. Why wasn't Michael listening to me? I placed my hands on his chest and with as much strength as I could, pushed him away. It didn't seem to do much. "Like playing rough love?" He grabbed me and turned me around, pushing my stomach against the wall. Fear was starting to set in.

"M-Michael, please" I started to tear up, fighting him harder than before. "I love a girl who's kinky" He pushed his pelvis against me and kissed the back of my neck. "I'll fuck you good, I promise" He ripped the red fabric, pulling it off of me. He turned me back around and smirked, looking me up and down. The perfect charming smile I had admired was gone, there was lust burning in his eyes. He was enjoying this.

"Elliot, sweetheart, you can't wear something like that and not expect to get fucked" He held my hands against the wall and looked me up and down. I was crying. Tears were streaming down my face. I didn't know what to do. "Help!" I yelled, wondering if I could get someone's attention. Michael didn't appreciate that and put his hand over my mouth. "Now, now darling. None of that, you want this" He looked at me, I couldn't even recognize him. Why was he doing this to me?

"Stop, please" I begged, shivering in just my bra and panties. "Be a good girl for me, don't you want to go to Paris?" He grabbed my cheeks. "I can make that happen but you need to be good for me" He squeezed my cheeks. "Besides baby, you've been begging me to fuck you for ages, I'm just finally giving you what you want" He smiled and started kissing me again. I was so scared, I was completely frozen. I couldn't make it stop. 

I continued to quietly beg and attempt to push him away but nothing was working. I just wanted it to end. He went to unclip my bra, but got frustrated and ripped it off of me. I went to cover myself up, hating how degraded I was feeling right now. "No, no....please" I mumbled. I wanted to die, a feeling I've never felt before. All I wanted was to completely disappear. 

I looked away from him, closing my eyes. I tried thinking of a happy place, trying to take myself out of the moment until it would end. But I could feel everything, he moved my hands away from my chest and kissed down my neck. I felt the wetness from his lips, I could smell the alcohol between us. I knew what was coming, I knew he was going to rape me. I dreaded every moment. I've never felt so scared in my life.

The man I knew was gone, he was just this monster in the alley now. His bright blue eyes seemed to turn black, like something out of a horror movie. But this, was real. Why was this happening to me? I sobbed to myself. I pleaded with him but he ignored my cries and continued to defile my body. He pulled off my underwear and threw them. "You're gonna be a good girl? Hmm?" He lifted me up, wrapping my legs around his waist. I was shaking, violently. 

When he unzipped his pants, I started fighting again. "No, no!" I cried, but he quickly covered my mouth again. I fought with everything I had, but it was no use. He overpowered me. He pushed himself inside of me, it was so painful. I whimpered, hating this feeling. I wanted more than anything to just die. 

I continued to fight as he thrust into me, desperately trying to make him stop. He held onto me tightly, he was moaning. I didn't understand how he enjoyed this, enjoyed making me feel like a tramp. "You're so tight, I could fuck you all night" He groaned loudly, thrusting harder and harder.

It felt like it was going to last forever. But after a few more moments, I heard the back door of the pub open. I made one last attempt to get help. "Stop, please, help me!" I cried out, I couldn't see the person who had walked out. Michael didn't notice either, he was too focused on me.

I thought the person was going to ignore what was going on but I heard footsteps coming closer. "Hey man, the girl said stop" The guy said. Michael ignored the guy and held against the wall. "Get out of here man, this is none of your business" Michael snapped at the guy. "Well, it becomes my business when you're a fucking rapist" The guy, ripped Michael away from me and threw him off of me. 

I sobbed, falling to the ground and trying to cover myself with my hands. I struggled to find my clothes, but everything was ripped. "Hey man, she's been begging me to fuck her all night" I heard Michael say defensively. "The poor girl is begging you to stop you sick asshole, get out of here before I punch you out" The guy warned, but Michael stood his ground. "She's just a worthless whore, why does it matter to you?" I cried to myself, Michael was right. Just a worthless whore.

The guy, who had helped me stepped towards Michael and punched him square in the face. He fell to his knees and the guy continued to beat him up. "Do you get off on raping girls? You fucking disgusting pig" He continued to effortlessly beat the hell out of him before Michael got to his feet and ran off. "You'll regret this, you bitch!" He yelled, leaving the alley.

I sat against the wall, hugging my knees to my chest and crying. I didn't know what to do, my clothes were torn. I didn't know what time it was. I wanted Lucy more than ever. The guy slowly came up to me. I quickly attempted to get away from him. He pulled off his sweater and held it out towards me, offering it to me. "Hey, don't worry. I'm not going to hurt you" He said calmly, leaning down. 

I took the sweater and quickly pulled it over my head, pulling it to my knees so I was covered. "Do you, um, need a ride home, or to the police station or something?" He asked. I didn't know how to speak, everything had just been torn away from me. More tears fell from my eyes. I already knew I was not going to the police. I just wanted to go home and pretend like nothing had happened.

The man gently grabbed my hand, but It startled me so I pushed him away. "I'm not gonna hurt you" He said seriously, reaching out more cautiously. He pulled me to my feet. I felt disgusting. "Here, I'll bring you to my car and we'll figure it out, yeah?" The sweater he had given to me, fell just above my knees. I slowly walked with him towards his car, terrified it was going to happen again. I was in so much pain, it was hard to walk.


	3. Chapter 3

I sat quietly in the stranger's car. I didn't know what to say to him. I was still crying. "Thank you" I whispered quietly, looking out the window. I played with the strings on the sweater. I was so grateful to this man, he saved me. "I live a bit off Oxford Street, it's um, a little flat on the corner" I tried hard to calm my breathing, I felt like I was going to hyperventilate.

"Are you sure you don't want to go to the police station? I could, um help if you want" I shook my head frantically. "Please, I just want to go home" My voice cracked, I was still in shock and in pain. I wanted all of it to go away, I wanted to disappear. I've never felt so disgusted with myself. I was just a piece of trash, I deserved it. I chose to drink tonight, it's my fault.

The drive was quiet. I wanted to say something, explain to him how grateful I was but nothing came out. I continued to play with the strings. I thought about what happened tonight. I could still feel his body pushing against me, I could feel the wetness from his lips and the pain of him pushing into me. I took a deep breath and looked out the window, more tears falling. How could Michael do this to me? I clearly told him no, why didn't he listen to me?

The man parked outside of the flat. He looked at me. I noticed Lucy's car in the driveway. I prayed to myself that she was asleep. I didn't plan on telling her what happened tonight, she didn't need to know. No one did. "This it?" He asked, I nodded and went to open the door. "Thank you, again" I whispered, looking at him. "Hey um, I don't usually do this but" He went through the glove box for a moment and pulled out some paper and a pen, he wrote something on it and handed it to me. 

"I'm sorry about what happened to you tonight, I should have killed the bastard for doing that. If you ever need to talk about it or anything or if decide to go to the police, just um shoot me a text" I took the paper from him and placed it in the sweater pocket. I intended to throw it away as soon as I got in the house. I wanted to forget this night as soon as possible. I nodded.

I closed the door to his car, turning away and quickly making my way towards the flat. I opened the door quietly, hoping that Lucy was asleep. I didn't want to explain to her what had happened. I could never put something like this on her shoulders. The flat was dark, meaning Lucy was probably passed out drunk in her room. I knew that I wouldn't be able to sleep tonight. Not after that.

I quietly went towards the bathroom, shutting the door and turning on the light. I hated what stared back at me. My makeup was smeared, my hair was a mess. I truly did look like a tramp. I turned away from the mirror quickly, breathing heavily. I pulled the paper out of the sweater pocket, I went to tear up but I stopped for a moment.

He saved me. A stranger, I didn't even get his name. Who knows what else Michael would have done with me if he hadn't shown up. I unfolded the paper and looked at it, a number was scribbled on it and underneath it read 'Harry'. I obviously assumed Harry was his name. I folded the paper back up and placed it on the counter. 

I hugged the sweater close to me, it smelled vaguely of mint and something sweet. I was so thankful for this, It helped ease how embarrassed I was. I pulled it over my head and also placed it on the counter. I stood there looking in the mirror. Whore. It was all I could think. How would people look at me if they found out what happened tonight?

No one is going to find out, It didn't happen. Nothing happened tonight. I took some deep breaths, trying to convince myself. I went over to the shower and turned it on. Maybe a nice shower will help me put this behind me. I waited for a few moments, letting it heat up. I looked in the mirror again, trying to recognize the face looking back at me. But it was hard, starring back at me was a girl who was beaten down and degraded. Every ounce of dignity had been stripped away. 

I slowly climbed into the warm shower, feeling just a bit more relaxed. I closed my eyes for a moment and let the water consume me. In that moment, everything that happened replayed threw my head. It was like it was happening again. I could feel the pressure of him holding me against the wall, I could taste his tongue and feel rough his hands, they were everywhere. I quickly opened my eyes, breaking down in the shower.

I cried, as quietly as I could. Sobbing to myself, I tried to wash it all away but it didn't work. I wanted to tell Lucy, I wanted to feel her holding me close and telling me everything was going to be alright. But I couldn't, Lucy can't know. It would kill her, or worse she wouldn't believe me. I sat under the running water, holding my knees close to my chest. I wished it was all just a horrific nightmare. I was really just sleeping in my bed, tomorrow was really the night of my show. My brain was just playing tricks on me, none of it was real.

I opened my eyes, but I was still sat underneath the warm water. Tears mixed with the water. I sobbed even more when I noticed the blood coming from in between my legs. I scrubbed my body as hard as I could, using all the soap I had to wash away how dirty I felt. Why? Why would someone I trusted put me through something like that? Why would Michael rape me? All I could think was that, I asked for it, Michael was right.

I sat under the water until it ran cold. I turned it off and slowly stood up. I wanted to scream as loudly as I could, I just wanted to hit a reset button, like none of this happened. But I couldn't. In a matter of moments everything was falling apart. I wrapped a towel around me, holding it tightly to my body. I tried avoiding the mirror, not wanting to look again. I was so disgusted at what looked back at me.

I grabbed the sweater and the piece of paper and walked towards my room. Lucy's door was still open, I looked in and saw her sleeping, still all dressed up. I hoped she had a good night, I hoped she'd never have to go through something like this. I shut her door and went into my room, turning on the light.

The room was full of art, paint brushes, pencils, pastels. Looking at all of it, made me want to cry. This got me into this mess. I placed the sweater on my dresser and noticed the painting on my wall. It was a painting given to me on my 21st birthday, back in January. Michael. I teared up and ripped the painting off the wall. I took it out of the frame and tore it to pieces, throwing the frame across my room. It smashed, into pieces. 

I went and sat on my bed, pulling the blankets on me. I wanted to feel safe, but not even my own bed could give that to me. I looked at the piece of paper in my hand. I wondered if the number was real, maybe it was just a fake number he gave me out of pity. I went to go rip it up again, I just wanted to forget about it all. But I couldn't, this man was the only one who knew what happened. I placed the paper on the night stand next to my bed and hugged the blankets close to me. There was no way I was going to be able to sleep tonight.

*Next Morning*

"Ellie, wake up!" Lucy yelled, bursting into my room. Though, I was already awake. I haven't been able to close my eyes for more than five minuets. "Oh, sleeping beauty is already awake" She smiled and came to sit on the bed in front of me. "Sorry about leaving without you last night, I looked for you but I think Michael got to you before I did" She winked at me. Just hearing his name, I wanted to throw up.

I stayed quiet, I didn't have words. Lucy had no clue what happened last night and I had no idea how to tell her. I couldn't. "You alright El?" She asked, looking at me. I took a deep breath and nodded. "Um, yeah, just the hang over" I say brushing it off. "I just drank a little too much" I shrugged. "Yeah, you seemed to be having a pretty good time, I saw you busting out some nice moves" She laughed and nudged me a little. I tried hard to show some form of emotion, I smiled just a bit. It felt odd faking a smile. Something I haven't done often. 

"Well, I was thinking of going out to grab some breakfast, wanna come?" She asked. I shook my head. "I- um, don't really feel well. I think, I'm just gonna stay in today" I mumbled, looking at my hands. I could tell she was looking at me weirdly. I never acted like this before, I was a person that was really hard to upset. I was always happy, even in the mornings. "You sure you're okay Ellie?" She placed her hand on my forehead. I smiled a bit more. "Luce, I'm fine. I think I'm just getting the flu or something. Probably ate something rotten" I say, in the most reassuring voice I could. 

"Well, I'll be sure to buy you some medicine. Are you sure you wanna just sit inside? I was hoping we could go shopping and buy you a sexy dress for your date!" She grabbed my shoulders and looked at me. The feeling of her grabbing me startled me, it brought me back to last night as Michael forced his body against mine. I quickly pushed her away, a bit harder than I intended. "Fuck, sorry Lucy" I say, gently grabbing her hand. "No no, it's okay. You're not feeling well" She smiled and squeezed my hand. She had no idea how bad I wanted to tell her, how much it hurt when she said his name. It made me so sick just thinking about him.

"I'll be back in a little while, I might stop by Ryan's house. Is that okay? I'll bring you back some food or something" She stood up from the bed. I wanted to hug her, I wanted to pull her into my arms and hold onto her forever. I wanted to pour my heart out to her. I knew I wouldn't, so I just nodded. "Okay, I'll text you if I need anything" I half smiled, feeling terrible because it was fake. "Alright love, I'll keep an eye out for some sexy dresses for you" She winked and walked out of the room.

It felt like every positive emotion I've ever felt, was wiped away. The way Michael stripped me until I was naked, it wasn't just my clothes that he toke with him. It was everything.


End file.
